Michaela Gagne, Miss Massachusetts 2006.

Friday, April 21, 2000 was a day I will never forget. I was 17 years old and sitting at the dinner table, about to take my first bite of salad, when the phone rang. My mom answered, and soon the tears began streaming down her face.

I knew right away that the tears were for me.

The doctor was calling to confirm I had the life-threatening heart condition called long QT syndrome (LQTS). For two years we had waited for an answer as to why I had collapsed at the finish line during a track meet. After that, my world as I knew it came crashing down. I realized I would now have to live my life without the one thing I had felt most defined me: sports.

There is nothing in the world I loved more than the thrill of athletic competition. In high school, I was a record-breaking, varsity-lettering, three-sport captaining athlete. All I wanted was to compete for the rest of my life. Now there would be no more playing basketball until the streetlights came on. No more racing my friends on the track. No more hopes for Division I soccer.

Not only was my true passion taken away from me, I was told that my heart was a ticking time bomb that could go off at any moment. I was confused, angry, sad. At the time, I could barely find any information on my condition, and found virtually no support with regards to meeting other young women with heart conditions. Despite the amazing support of my friends and family, it was the most alone I have ever felt in my life.

I felt like a freak. It seemed the odds were against me.

But…I was alive, and I had been given a chance.

My world took a turn for the better the day I decided I would concentrate on what I had, not on what I didn’t have.

I threw myself into my artwork, concentrated harder than ever on my academics, and then made the most unlikely decision of my life: I decided to enter a beauty pageant!

If you had known me then, you would understand that I am probably the least likely beauty contestant. Ever since I could walk, I would have rather chosen to roll around in the dirt or play ball with the boys than wear a dress or brush my hair.

But I saw the pageant as a new form of competition, a way to fill the void. Even though I walked across the stage like a football player in my swimsuit and heels, I actually loved the experience, because I was able to speak to the judges regarding my platform issue of lethal heart syndromes. My pageant experience can only be described as empowering and therapeutic.

I still missed being an athlete, though. I missed everything about it.

Michaela participating in soccer.

So I started researching implantable cardioverter defibrillators (ICDs) and soon asked my doctor, “If I get one of those metal things in my chest, will you let me play sports again?” He agreed, and one month before entering college I had my first ICD implanted. I was the only person in the waiting room under 60, but I didn’t care. I was safe now, with no restrictions on my life anymore.

I soon returned to soccer, and it was one of the best days of my life to lie on that field after playing. Of course, now I had a little ‘pageant’ in my blood too! Displaying the new scar on my chest that the athlete in me insisted was a war wound, I returned to the stage and worked hard.